President James A. Garfield's

"Rules for Living"

• Never be idle.
• Make few promises.
• Always speak the truth.
• Live within your income.
• Never speak evil of anyone.
• Keep good company or none.
• Live up to your engagements.
• Never play games of chance.
• Drink no intoxicating drinks.
• Good character is above everything else.
• Keep your own secrets if you have any.
• Never borrow if you can possibly help it.
• Do not marry until you are able to support a [spouse].
• When you speak to a person, look into his/[her] eyes.
• Save when you are young to spend when you are old.
• Never run into debt unless you see a way out again.
• Good company and good conversation are the sinews of virtue.
• Your character cannot be essentially injured except by your own acts.
• If anybody speaks evil of you, let your life be so that no one believes him.
• When you retire at night, think over what you have done during the day.
• If your hands cannot be employed usefully, attend the culture of your mind.
• Read the above carefully and thoughtfully at least once a week.

Some alternative rules to live by that might get you thinking and laughing in other directions . . .

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